When I first sat down to write “THE EVOLUTION OF A GANGSTER TURNED GURU” it was the easiest 300 pages I ever wrote reliving the experiences of my criminal past. I wanted the reader to know that there wasn’t an aspect of this gangster lifestyle which I hadn’t participated in. The ‘go hard or go home’, ‘get rich or die trying’, ‘feast or famine’ attitude for over twenty years had so many stories that it was going to end up being a four book series. But what I recognized was that the content of what I was writing in what would turn out to probably be the first three books would read like Urban novels, or what I generally call “Hood Books.” I knew the message wasn’t corresponding to what I’m inspired to express. Although it’s who I was, it’s no longer who I choose to be and even though my intent wasn’t to glorify my gangster past, some might interpret it that way and influence anyone on that path is the last thing I wanted to do. What if they only read the first three books without getting to the transformation part? No. I don’t need to build my gangster credibility with the reader. Trust me, my forty-five-year sentence from the United States Government as the leader of a criminal enterprise for a resume is enough to do that alone.
Who I thought myself to be I discovered was not who I truly am and with the realization of life’s laws and principals, I’ve experienced how the truth is always the solution to difficulties that I’ve been faced with. That truth lead me to change my process of thought because I’m the first to admit that I didn’t know how to think. Oh, I thought I knew it all when entertaining my gangster mentality in an attempt to achieve what I expected to bring peace and happiness. Yet the cause, which was the way I thought, didn’t correspond with the effect I was attempting to accomplish. I had no idea of the Universal laws and principals that govern life until I consciously made a decision to search for the truth.
My inner desire enlightened me to a spiritual way of living by realizing that we are immersed in a creative intelligence, an eternal goodness of unconditional love and law. The awakening to my true being under conditions that most consider hell on earth is just more evidence of the power we all have access to. I’ve achieved that peace and happiness which is enhanced by sharing this truth with others.
I’m not a spiritual sage or mystic. It wasn’t a beam of light or burning bush that woke me up late at night to tell me this spiritual truth. It was the experience of the laws and love of God that shed the light on the darkness, making it clear for me to see that the darkness didn’t’ even exist.
Yet, as long as I continued to hold the perception and belief of being a criminal gangster, the laws corresponding to that thought pattern of my inner concept created the outward experience. But the essence of who I am and who you are cannot and does not change. The journey of life’s unfoldment is one of self-discovery that we must each individually experience in our own way. The importance of one’s own personal experience can’t be emphasized enough since this is the foundation of your conviction in what you believe.
It’s not enough for me to say that we are all spiritual beings, unified with life, living in a Universe of creative intelligence that operates according to these Universal laws that are set in motion due to the way we think, words we speak and actions we take to create our experience. That this law is God’s law of cause and effect based on an impersonal principle of being a natural law, which means that regardless if used destructively or constructively the law will take the impression of our thoughts and attract the experience that our thinking directed it to do. As good as that sounds, learning is just not that easy. Most of us are actually bound by our creative freedom for not consciously being aware of the influence our thinking has in the conditions we find ourselves in.
With the limitless law and infinite intelligence of God, there’re no limits on what we can individually achieve except the limits that we place on ourselves according to what it is that we each believe.
Spiritual knowledge of this Universal system of life brings the essence of your spiritual perfection to the surface. But until we individually make a conscious decision to challenge the false ideas held about ourselves and analyze why our lives are in what appears to be a constant state of turmoil, then we can’t expect the habits of thoughts that created the present circumstances to attract something different in the future.
By changing my thought patterns from a gangster living in fear, being angry and frustrated with the world, to a mentality of a spiritual nature, God’s laws direct me to the right path in the choices that I make and experiences that I create. When I don’t know what to do or seem confused, I understand that there is an intelligence within me that does know and will reveal the answers, giving me this unyielding poise that I experience creating peace, harmony and happiness that so many have trouble finding. They search outside of themselves for that which resides within.
This understanding didn’t happen overnight. What’s important is that it happen and regardless of my outer situation, my inner experience of the peace and love in God doesn’t change. So I teach what I’ve learned in an attempt to help other realize and recognize the divine essence of their being. I write in modern day language of an age old all-inclusive universal truth, teaching God’s love, law and how it works according to the way we think. I keep a mental attitude of gratitude. Discussing this truth that’s an antidote to the deep emotional pain and distress that so many of us suffer from. You may not be in the dire situations that are read about in the following pages, but the method and solutions to find peace and happiness with a meaningful life are the same.
One’s outer circumstances cannot dictate your emotional state unless you allow them to. We see this all the time with two people in the exact same environment, one is joyful and the other is miserable. The only difference between the two are the inner thoughts they choose to entertain. This is the essence of our free will, the choice to choose how we think and what we think about. This makes all the difference in the creation of your life because you’ll experience who you think you are even if it isn’t true. And here is where we find the unconditional love of God’s laws, allowing us to experience who we are not in order to discover who we truly are. I’ve created immeasurable challenges for myself, transforming them into opportunities that inspired a change that brought about The evolution of a gangster turned guru.
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I’m expecting that you found out about this site through the my first book Voice for the Silent Fathers: My memoir detailing the controversial experience of being the young father of a son who would grow up to be the gayest man on the planet! My “NO SON OF MINE!!” street gangster mentality evolves during my difficult life journey coming to realize that his responsibility as a loving father didn’t change just because my son is gay.
Gangster Turned Guru Presents 